Multiply and Replenish

"God's commandment to multiply and replenish the earth remains in force."

(The Family: A Proclamation to the World"

The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints is a family based organization.  It teaches the importance of family.  It teaches that families can be together forever.  The family is the most important institution in the world.  However, fertility rates have been steadily dropping for many years.  

There are many reasons for this decline, some of which include: the expenses of having children, especially a large family, are high, career and education, and even influence by government.  Having children takes time and money.  Some families find that they cannot provide for a large family.  Others don't feel like they can, or want to, provide the time for children.  Women have been pressured in the last few decades to become more independent and educated.  More emphasis is being put on getting an education, and achieving success in their career.  Sometimes, when they are finally able to settle down, they realize that it is too late.  Some governments are putting pressure on their citizens to limit the size of their families.  For example, in the 1970's, China enforced a one child rule.  This remains in practice today.

Young people are pressured every day to wait to start a family until they have completed their education.  My husband and I were married when I was 19, and he was 21.  We chose to start our family not long after that.  When he was excepted into dental school, we had two young boys, and I was expecting my third son in a few months.  We attended a "Welcome" dinner for all of the new dental students, and their spouses.  After we introduced ourselves, and told a little about ourselves, a secretary from the school, who I later learned was a member of the Church, approached me.  She made small talk and then said, "Well, I bet you wish you would have waited to have all of those kids.  You are going to have a rough next four years.", and then she walked away.  I didn't know how to feel.  At first, I was ashamed, feeling that we had somehow made a wrong choice in bringing these sweet boys into the world.  Then I felt embarrassed that we had somehow thought that we could make it through four years of dental school and be parents.  I wondered if everyone around us was laughing , and waiting for us to fail.  When I mentioned this to my husband later that night, he said," Well, that's sad that she feels that way.  We knew that we were supposed to have these kids, and so did Heavenly Father.  He helped me get into dental school, and He will help us get through it.".  And He did.  We were blessed because we had followed His counsel.  How sad though, that a woman that had been taught the same gospel principles that I had, would make me feel bad for following them, when she should have been supporting me.

Having a family, and being parents can be scary.  It can be overwhelming, and it is hard work.  But, if we are doing the things that our Heavenly Father has commanded us to do, He will always be there to help us, if we ask Him.  There are some couples that are not able to have as many children as they wanted, and some that may never be able to have biological children.  In those cases, President Hinckley gave us great counsel.  He said,

"The Lord has told us to multiply and replenish the earth that we might have joy in our posterity, and there is no greater joy than the joy that comes of happy children in good families.  But he did not designate the number, nor has the Church.  That is a sacred matter left to the couple and the Lord."

My friend from college, Whitney, and her husband Quin were married and started a family not long after.  They were blessed with three beautiful children, however, because of health problems, Whitney was not able to have more children.  They did not, however, feel that their family was complete.  They counseled with family, and with their Heavenly Father, and found that adoption was the answer for their family.  They were able to adopt two sons from China.  Although Whitney did not bear these children, they are now sealed to them, and they are an important part of their family.  We should always counsel with our spouses and our Heavenly Father to make decisions about the size of our families.

"Of all the joys of life, none other equals that of happy parenthood.  Of all the responsibilities with which we struggle, none other is so serious.  To rear children in an atmosphere of love, security, and faith is the most rewarding of all challenges.  The good result from such efforts becomes life's most satisfying compensation."  

--President Gordon B. Hinckley